A Trip to the Gym...

Here are three things that I realized when I went to the gym today:

*It sure felt like I burned more than 342 calories on the treadmill...

*I really, really dislike reruns on Soul Train playing on the locker room T.V. when I put my make-up on.

**Most importantly: When wearing a flirty little thong with a long ribbon bow on the back, ladies make absolutely sure that you tuck those sexy little ribbons INSIDE your jeans. They don't look good hanging out the back of your jeans.


The last observation put me in some internal conflict. Do I tell this woman that her flirty thong ribbons are hanging out of her jeans (which made me feel like I was staring)? Or do I let her figure it out.

I decided to let her figure it out. Sorry...

A Dose of Self Help

I've recently subscribed to a few magazines that I would normally not have paid money for. I had some frequent flier miles that were due to expire, so I exchanged them for free subscriptions. I got a few of them in the mail yesterday and I am now set with my New Year's Resolution Plans...

On the cover of the magazine the following articles were advertised:

"In a Hurry? Tone up in 23 minutes!"

"Be a Diet Success! Slimming Secrets that Really Work"

"Happy at Last! Stop Worrying and Start Living"

"Look Amazing Without Makeup"

"Make ANY Meal Healthier!"

"The SCARY Disorder Doctors Don't Detect"

and to top it off...

"176 Tips to Simplify Your Life!"

How am I going to have time to simplify my life? I'm spending 23 minutes toning, trying to stop worrying (Steve would love that!), trying to look amazing without makeup, trying to make sure that my doctor detects scary disorders, trying to be a diet success and making my meals healthier. Do you really think I have time to read 176 ways to make my life simpler?